Thursday, November 18, 2010

Depression is...


For me...

Depression is waking up in the morning, forcing yourself out of bed, going through the motions of functioning because you have to, and wondering how in the hell you're going to make it until 9 or 10 at night when you are allowed to crash and burn and just hide from the world.

Depression is watching the most precious gifts in the world grow and learn and be around you and just not being able to enjoy it and fully take it all in the way you know you should and the way you want to more than anything!

Depression is constantly having to tell yourself "I think I can" but secretly knowing you can't - or worse yet, that you just won't because you don't know where to start or how to motivate yourself to do it.

Depression is dark and lonely and scary and frustrating and hopeless and never-ending.

Depression is barely getting by.

Depression is the deep divide between knowing you have to get something done and even wanting to and actually being able to accomplish it.

Depression is a dark cloud you carry with you even on the sunniest and brightest of days.

Depression is a fog that never burns off in the sunshine.

1 comment:

Heidi said...

I noticed that no one has hurried to jump in and comment on this one. My first, and really only, thought is....did you post this now because you are feeling this way now? Are you struggling this badly at this moment in time? Or has this one been sitting around in your drafts and you just thought it was time to put it out there?

Depression is tough, no matter how you try to spin it. It is even tougher to struggle with it when the people around you think you can just snap your fingers and make it all go away, as if you WANT to feel that bad!

No fantastic words of wisdom here. I like the put one foot in front of the other approach and each day it will get a little easier. (Kind of a fake it til you feel it) Or how about the talk about it out loud to lighten the load a little approach? :)