Simple Woman's Daybook...February 1, 2010

FOR TODAY...Feburary 1, 2010

Outside my window...a bright round object that I am unfamiliar with is emitting some sort of LIGHT.  Could this be the oft talked about, but seldom seen SUN I've heard stories about?  HA!
I am thinking...it's time to focus my energies on simplifying.  For example, does any one person REALLY need 5 active email addresses?  It gets awfully confusing (just ask my sister who keeps wondering why I'm not responding to her emails when I haven't logged into the one she's been using in weeks!)
I am thankful for...friends who are flexible enough to keep up with me!
From the kitchen...nothing.  I'm meeting Tiffany out for dinner so I don't have to cook tonight (Thank God!)
I am wearing...a big fuzzy turtleneck sweater, perfect for a chilly day like today.

I am remembering...a long list of to dos I'm hoping to accomplish after the kids go to bed tonight.  I could write it down so I won't forget but what's the challenge in THAT? 
I am creating...a wish list for 2010.  Things I would like to acquire for myself or my family in the next year.  On the list so far:  A Keurig coffee maker, a Cricut (for ease in my Etsy creations), a new, larger house for my family.  We did well last year having crossed off everything on the list we aimed for including a new camera, a swing set for the boys (thank you Freecycle!), a Harley for Dave, a generator, and finishing the fence in the back yard.
I am going...crazy!  There is a loud truck outside my window that has been driving me bonkers for almost an hour!  I'm getting a little punchy in here trying to tune it out so I don't go totally insane!
I am reading...blogs.  I add new ones all the time and am purging some that are just too rich for my blood.  I simply don't have enough brain power to keep up with some people. 
I am hoping...for peace in the hearts of friends who are going through trials and rough patches.  Whether at work, personally, mentally, or physically, I just wish I could take away all their suffering and heartache.
I am hearing...nothing.  Ahhhh...that truck has moved on and I feel at peace.

Pondering these words..."Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task". - William James
How true.  How depressing.  I think I need to work on that.
Around the house...toys, toys, and more toys.  Have you seen this post?

On my mind...the words above.  Ugh, I have so many unfinished tasks.  So many projects I start and never complete.  I need to finish the unfinished and complete the uncompleted. 

Noticing that...I'm running a theme today.  Simplify and Focus. 
One of my favorite things...my blog.  It's one of those places I know I can always go and be "heard".  I don't feel judged by how I'm feeling or what I'm saying.  It's all MINE and it's always there when I need it.  Thanks, Blog.  And thank you, my bloggy friends and family, for listening!
A few plans for the rest of the week:  Looking forward to meeting Tiff and Brie at Melon Bean tonight, hooking up with my fellow NaBloPoMo-er, Heidi, for our weekly "Walk and Talk" (can't wait!!), more purging (of stuff), laundry, and lots of story and snuggle times.

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

 

Overstuffed

My plate is OVERFLOWING these days.  Not much unlike anyone else's I know this time of the year.  But I feel like my potatoes and my meat are all getting squished together and my beans are falling off onto the table.  It's a mess.

My life, my home and my mind is in a constant state of chaos.

It should be telling to say that I got notification that my Women's Day subscription (a magazine I've been getting for some time, for unknown reasons, that would be interesting to read if I had time but instead has been piling up, un-perused, since I started receiving them) is up for renewal and I was thrilled.  The expiration notice I received via email actually brought a flash of relief and instead of saying "Oh, drat!" (which I wouldn't say anyway, but whatever...), I exclaimed (out loud, which probably looked odd since I was sitting in my office, alone, with only my computer), "Thank God!".

Why would receiving such news bring such joy?  Why would one rejoice at notification that money was due or that something was being discontinued?  Simply put, because it's one less thing.  One less thing to sort, one less thing to stress about (yes, I stress about such things), and one less thing to deal with, store, and eventually dispose of.

I've previously made reference to my stress about stuff and my desire to simplify my life, as well.  This magazine subscription expiry is a natural, unsolicited blessing.  Thank God for small blessings.  Now if only my Christmas cards would address themselves, my presents would magically be wrapped, and my house would somehow clean itself in preparation for Holiday guests, I'd be less stuffed and more relaxed.  There's always the 1st of the new year for relaxing....HA!

Short on time, long on to-do lists...

I read a lot of blogs and it seems I've stumbled on a not-so-surprising theme lately.  Everyone is short on time and long on to-do lists, expectations, and responsibilities.

On one hand I feel better knowing I'm not alone in being overwhelmed by the never-ending demands of this grown-up life.  But on the other hand it concerns and saddens me.  It's showing an obvious pattern in society that we, as a whole, are over-extending ourselves.  We spend so much time having to be something special and do amazing feats and prove impossible things, that we forget to just be.

I read this email from a friend of mine earlier this week that sums it up:  In today's day and age, we spend more, but have less.  We buy more, but enjoy it less.  We've multiplied our possessions, but decreased our values.  We've learned to rush, but not to wait.  Why is that?  Where have we gone wrong?  Have we "advanced" so much as a society that we've actually gone BACKWARD in our ability to just enjoy life?

There was a comedian I saw on Facebook recently who totally hit the nail on the head by saying we have things better than we ever have before but we fail (or have simply forgotten HOW) to just appreciate what we have.  Stop and think about how far we've come and how lucky and blessed we are to have the opportunities, the advancements, and the freedoms this life brings.  The key here is to STOP and THINK.  Maybe that would help ground us and keep us sane in this chaotic world that has us go, go, going all the time.  I know it's worth a shot.  Stop.  Think.  And breathe.

Help Wanted: Inquire Within

I am the complete opposite of technologically gifted.  Whatever that would be, I am.  I assure you, the Geek Squad would NOT be calling on me to join their ranks.  Steve Jobs is definitely NOT knocking on my door to offer me a job.  Radio Shack wouldn't even want me working for them, for that matter.  In fact, I barely know what a hard drive is much less how to spell HTML.  

I have a basic cell phone and still only recently figured out how to save photos and send text messages on it.  In February I bought a new Canon Rebel and still have yet to figure out how to use it beyond the "automatic" and "no flash" settings.  My video camera has capabilities way beyond my limited understanding of its functions.  It's all such a waste.

In a world that is so quickly advancing I feel like I'm being left behind.  It stresses me out and frustrates me beyond belief.  I would love to know what I'm doing so I could keep up.  Technology has the ability to make my life EASIER, but instead my lack of knowledge cripples me and has me struggling at every turn. Surely there is an easier way for people like me, to whom an understanding of technology does not come easily.  All I want is to figure out the basics and not feel like I'm missing something or throwing away the possibilities that are available to me.

I am beginning to feel a new sense of understanding for my Grandma who, at 91 never knew how to use a computer, never owned a cell phone, thought cable television was complicated, and never did figure out how to program her VCR even with explicit written instructions.  I could use some explicit written instructions.

I'm not asking for much.  I'd just like to be able to decipher the error code my hard drive that stores my iPhoto library has been giving me.  I'd like to figure out how to get my printer/scanner/copier to work so I could print mapquest directions or an email from time to time.  I want to figure out an easy way to make my Time Machine back up run automatically without having to think about it too much.  I could use a simpler means through which to upload, edit, store and back up my photos.  Not to mention making my blog pretty or figuring out how to make a header for my page or increase my margins so I can use bigger pictures.  I'm struggling here.  Some people need housekeepers or nannies.  I need a resident computer geek.  Anyone looking for work?

Peddling my wares...

I hate garage sales.

Now, don't get me wrong...I mean, I love shopping at them and I love how they allow me to get rid of useful stuff, earn some money, and get over my sentimental attachment to my stuff.

But I absolutely hate having a garage sale.  I don't like setting them up.  I despise gathering, cleaning, sorting, and pricing my baubles.  It's very difficult for me to put a price on something that means a lot to me but is simply taking up room (my children's baby items, a picture I bought to decorate our house when we first moved in that I just haven't found a use for yet, Nathaniel's stuffed animals that are reminiscent of the characters he loves but that he could basically care less about and are taking up WAY too much room.)  Putting a fair (garage sale) market price on sentimentality is HARD - there's a lot of pressure involved!

On top of the hassle of setting things up, it drives me nuts to deal with some of the people who come to garage sales.  You know the type - those people who want something for nothing.  Or think garage sale prices are still too much to pay so they barter - "Would you take 60 cents for this?  It's marked .75?".  Or they want something that's marked $10 but mysteriously only have $6 in their wallet so they'll have to run to the ATM/go cash a check at Wilson Farms/run home and ask their Mom for it.  

Then there are the lazy people.  Those people who don't want to get out of their cars to find out how much you're asking for something so they sit at the end of your driveway and yell out their car window "How much for the [insert item here]?"  

On top of that you have the advertising requirements, the sign placement strategies, keeping the kids occupied and OUT OF THE STUFF you have purposefully displayed for maximum affect and sale-ability.  I swear Nathaniel found a new love for everything we had in the garage sale despite how long it sat in his room untouched or how passe something had become prior to moving it out to the garage and putting a price sticker on it.  He kept telling me "Mommy, you have to get the toys out of the garage sale and put them back in my room".  Uh, no.  If I did that he'd have to lose something far more important to make room for that stuff again - like his bed, or about 15 of the 17 blankets he sleeps with.  Now, we wouldn't want that, would we?  

Anyway, speaking of the weather...does this look conducive to high garage sale traffic and killer profits? 

No, it doesn't.  But that's ok.  We actually made out pretty well, considering.  We sold some bigger ticket items early and day two had nicer weather which helped even things out.  

At least it's over now.  We took down the signs and put some stuff out on the curb.  Took photos to get some of the bigger (less storable stuff) up on Craigslist, then packed up the leftovers in boxes marked "Garage Sale" to do it all over again next year.  Now I think I'll take my $109 and go shopping for some more stuff.  

Inanimate Sentimentality

Today's Thinkbox drawing (chosen by my beloved husband) garnered the following question:  "Do you remember your family getting a new piece of furniture, a new car, or something similar when you were a child?"

As long as I can remember I've always had an unnatural attachment to things.  The mass quantity of boxes in my basement are a true testament to that fact.  I have old notes from middle school, tokens of love from high school, reports and papers from college.  Shoes I wore to the prom, a shirt an ex-boyfriend let me keep, old cats-eye glasses of my grandmother's.  Each item holds a memory, an old feeling, a reminiscent spark from a time gone by.  

It's a problem, really.  The number one reason why I find it so difficult to downsize and simplify my life.  But it's been this way for as long as I can remember.  I get attached easily to material things.  Which brings me to my answer to today's thinkbox question.

When I was little (I'd guess maybe 5 or 6) my parents traded in their grey station wagon (It had an actual name but I don't recall it at the moment - phantom?  ghost?)  Anyway, I vividly remember taking that car to the dealership where we were picking up our new (1980-something Renault Alliance!) and leaving that car behind.  I was DEVASTATED!  I clung to the backseat of that car and cried my little eyes out.  I was a mess!  I sat in that backseat and hugged the car, told the car that it had been a good car, that it wouldn't be forgotten...Sad, I know.  Ok, less sad - more pathetic.  But still - I was genuinely torn up!

What does this say, besides that I'm a freak?  Ultimately I think this really shows that I hate change.  At least in the case of the car.  I was NOT ready to warm up to a new car - a new seating arrangement, new fit and feel, or perhaps I was simply hesitant to have to learn the new location of the cupholders.  Who knows, really?  

As for my boxes in the basement.  That is more about my fear of forgetting.  I have a horrible memory and holding on to STUFF dupes me into thinking that I will somehow remember all the adventures, mishaps, relationships, and fun I've had along the way.  Too bad that doesn't guarantee anything.  

Lord help me when it comes time to trade in my precious Honda Civic!  Millie has been very good to me for the last 10 years and 120,000 miles!  And truth be told, I'm not ready to have to figure out how to re-program a new clock for Daylight Savings Time!  Oh, no!  I can feel the tears welling up as I write this!  Does anyone have a tissue?!?

       

Simplify and Focus

It’s a message I’ve been trying to get through to my husband for months (dare I say, years?)…Simplify and focus. I keep saying our interests are too diverse. Our energies are expended too widely, our resources (time, money, etc.) are spread too thin and our attentions need to be focused. We need to cut back, reign in, and hone our extracurricular activities. It’s a basic principle. We camp, we hunt, we boat, we fish, we hike, we bike, we walk, we stalk (OK, so we don’t STALK…but I was on a roll there) – basically, we LOVE the outdoors, period. However, all of our interests are fair weather activities. Our life is chaotic and our hobbies all fall within the same time frame. The inevitable consequence is that nothing is done well - nothing has our entire focus, complete devotion, 100% commitment, or our full investment.

It makes perfect logical sense. We should downsize, pick an interest or two - simplify and focus.

Why am I rambling on about this, you may wonder? What is the magical epiphany in all this? In going through this exercise in my head, I came to the conclusion that I should really be listening to myself a little more. I am completely guilty of this in my own life - in my head, in my hobbies, in my priorities. I need to stop. Look. Listen. I need to rewind. Reevaluate. Re prioritize. After all, I am always complaining that there are not enough hours in the day. I have the basics to accomplish - parenting, cleaning, laundry, dishes, bills. Then there are my sanity savers - photos, blogging, reality TV.

A horoscope I received in a recent fortune cookie spells it out perfectly for me. It reads: You cannot be anything if you want to be everything.

Profound, no?

So in saying this and coming to this realization, I hereby vow to simplify and focus. I will pick one or two things that mean the most. I'll focus on my family, a few basics (so as to avoid CPS from knocking at the door when a roach infestation takes over my disaster of a house) and simplify my diverse interests to a passion or two. As a result, I hope to perfect these priorities and excel at that which is most important. Everything else will just have to give (for now). Wish me luck!