Simple Woman's Daybook...September 28, 2010

FOR TODAY...September 28, 2010

Outside my window...rain.  Icky, yucky, miserable rain and the dark clouds that go with it.

I am thinking...about what the boys should be/want to be for Halloween.  Our festivities start up in a couple of weeks so I want to be prepared.  I think Alex should be a spider, hands down.  He's such a little climber and he did monkey last year!  Nate wants to be a "pirate firefighter Army guy" so I'm not sure about that one...my vote is Army guy since he's been a pirate the last two years and he's a firefighter every other day of the year!  We'll see if I can talk him into that!

I am thankful for...my many friends and supportive family!  I am truly blessed to have such great people in my life!  With a group like these people holding me up, I know I can never fall!

From the kitchen...healthier eating.  Or at least I'm trying to.  I was doing so well, having lost more than 4 lbs since the beginning of September.  Only to creep back up after this birthday weekend of eating crap, I'm sure.  Ugh. 

I am wearing...a warm fuzzy sweater.  I do love sweater weather.  I just wish it wasn't so wet and chilly today...the cold factor is no fun.

I am remembering...to drag the kids to Target after work so I can pick up some diapers for Alex.  Just diapers.  That's all I need.  Not $60 of other stuff that isn't diapers.  I need only diapers.  Wish me luck.

I am going...to the Apple Fest later this week.  I love the Fall season and all the apple picking, pumpkin patching fun that comes with it!
 I am hoping...to win an auction on Ebay for an adorable spider costume for Alex. 

I am hearing...silence.  It's a very quiet day around here today...I will take advantage of it while I can.  Lord knows it's not quiet around my house!
 
Around the house...it's actually somewhat clean for the moment.  I have a bazillion more boxes to unload but that will create more chaos so I'll just enjoy the wide open, clean spaces for now!

On my mind...Fall plans, to-do lists, get rich quick schemes that will allow me to be the stay-at-home Mom I so wish I could be...so many things!

Noticing that...weight loss is very difficult when everything I plan and enjoy involves food.  I find a lot of relaxation and happiness in food.  It's a challenge when everything I love revolves around food that is generally bad for me.  I have to come up with some better tactics. 

One of my favorite things...hugs and kisses from my boys!

A few plans for the rest of the week:  Photoshop class #3 with Heidi,  school photos for Nate, three grants due by Friday, my oldest stepson, Adam's 26th (!) birthday, Apple Fest with Tiff, whatever else the days bring!

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...I'm amazed at how quickly my baby...

...became this handsome, busy, happy toddler!!

 

Happy birthday, Alex!

All Time High = All Time Low

I'm at an all time high. 

But before you applaud or rejoice or say "yippee", let me explain.  Never in my 34 years of life have I ever weighed THIS much.  Ok, I take that back...I did when I was 6 months pregnant with either of my children, perhaps.  But without the excuse of having an entire other human being in my body, I have never weighed as much as I do now.  This does not make me happy.

Thus, my "all time low".

Nathaniel was using one of my t-shirts (that I don't wear anymore because it's unflattering-ly tight) as a pillow the other day and said "What's this Mom?" - when I told him it was Mommy's t-shirt, he said (incredulously) "No, it's not Mom!  This is too small!   This is a shirt from when I was baby!".

I'm in a funk and I need to defunk-tify.  (Yes, it's a word.  I swear!)  I'm tired of being one of those Moms.  The kind you see and feel bad for because they've "let themselves go".  The words: frumpy, homely, uncool, and boring come to mind.  I want to be someone my children can be proud of.  I want to set good examples for them as far as eating healthy and being active go.  I don't want them to be embarrassed of me when they get older.   I want to fit back into cute clothes, and not have my wedding rings fit so snugly.  I want to feel pretty again and not worry that people are judging "the fat girl" for every little thing I put in my mouth.  I want to feel comfortable in my own skin again.

So, I vow to do something about it.

I joined Weight Watchers Online yesterday and have officially started meticulously tracking my points online today.  I will work exercise into my daily routine.  I will eat better, eat less, make healthier choices.  I have enlisted the aide of some of my best supporters and motivators for encouragement. 

So here's to big changes (and hopefully big LOSSES!) in the coming months...better Me, here I come!  

Resolution Mumbo Jumbo

I am not exactly what you would call a "stick-to-it" type.  When the going gets tough, I bail.  I hate that about myself, but it's mostly true.  That's why this resolution thing is hairy for me.  I always start out with strong convictions, good intentions, and smart ideas but it all goes off track very easily.

I'm a deadline-driven girl.  I need due dates and structured time lines to get stuff accomplished.  I'm a procrastinator in every sense of the word.  If there is a way to put something off, I will find it.  If there is something I can do BEFORE having to do that which I really need to do, I will do it.  But deadlines usually kick me into gear.  At the very last minute, of course.  For some reason, the threat of someone being mad at me or failing to meet a deadline weighs heavily on my mind and motivates me to complete things.  And even though I might procrastinate until the 11th hour, I always rally and come through in the bitter end. 

Anyway, with that said, resolutions are sticky for me.  I have many "self-improvement projects" I'm constantly undergoing.  Many things on my to-do list I'd like to actually accomplish.  But for some reason having the whole year to accomplish them in doesn't sound deadline-y enough.  And I think my expectations *gasp* for realistic goals may be a bit high.

That's why this year I'm tossing aside the lofty "I want to be skinny by 2011" and "I vow to cook like Julia Childs, clean like Mr. Clean, and decorate like Martha Stewart" type goals.  I'm setting aside the vague ambitions to "be happy" or "be a better Mother" and I'm going for something more attainable.  Don't get me wrong, there's definitely room for improvement there and I could certainly use a reminder to tweak my perspective on things from time to time, but as for hard and fast resolutions, I'm simplifying a little this year.

Here goes:

I want to lose 15 lbs before my cousin's wedding (in Arizona!) in April.  I figure that's just shy of 16 weeks away, so a pound a week is a realistic goal.  Now, in good goal-setting technique, I've also thought about how I will do this.  Being realistic, I know I have neither the time, nor the willpower to go back on Weight Watchers full-force at the moment, but I do intend on eating better, with the WW theories in mind.  Loosely "counting" my points, paying attention to the fiber intake, limiting calories and fat...and exercising AT LEAST 3 times a week.  That's not ALL the weight I hope to lose in 2010, but I figured I'd start small - with a DEADLINE of sorts to work towards.  Losing fifteen pounds would get me back to pre-Alex weight and that would be better than where I'm at now!  After I reach that goal I'll work towards my next goal or losing another 20 to get back to my pre-Nate weight...and so on and so forth.  Baby steps!  :)

Next, I want to complete my 101 in 1001 list and get started on that project.  For a refresher on that goal of mine, read here.

Lastly, I want to get my house organized and de-cluttered.  The bigger goal here is to get our house on the market and get it SOLD this year.  It's time to move out of the City and to somewhere bigger and better.  Nathaniel starts school in just over a year and a half and I do NOT want him starting in City schools.  Plus, this 900-something square foot house is closing in on us as the boys get older and their stuff gets bigger!  It's time.  I am learning to part with things I realistically don't need and have agreed to do so more simply (trip to Salvation Army versus trying to Craigslist or Freecycle it all which is VERY time consuming).  Now I just need to find the TIME to tackle my piles.  Again, small doses.  Chip away,  layer by layer.

So, while I will continue working on those self-improvement projects (work on my patience and perspective, be a better mother, etc.) and that to-do list (clean the basement, purge Nate's toys, go through the kids' clothes, etc.)...I will focus my resolution effort for 2010 towards the three goals above. As the year progresses, I will keep you up to date on my progress.  I hope you all will hold me accountable to some degree!  Happy 2010 to you all!  Thanks for following me on this blogging journey in 2009 and I hope you all have a prosperous new year!  May you all accomplish that which YOU set out to take on!