Simple Woman's Daybook...September 14, 2010

FOR TODAY...September 14, 2010

Outside my window...the sun is shining.  The fall temperatures have crept in (which is ok by me...).  I noticed the leaves starting to change on my drive into work this morning!

I am thinking...about my brother and sister-in-law who are just (2!) weeks away from welcoming my nephew into the world!  Now begins the dreaded "waiting game" and I sympathize!  I hope for a quick and easy (and safe!) delivery for all involved!

I am thankful for...the time spent with my mother-in-law at dinner last night.  She is a fantastic woman and she and Nate are so cute together.  She has recently been diagnosed with cancer and has decided at her age not to take any action against it so I am thankful for any time we have to build memories with her.  She was telling stories of Dave's father last night which was nice to hear.  It's difficult to get Dave to talk about anything much less his family so I was grateful for a glimpse into his past.

From the kitchen...I am trying really hard at eating better and keeping better options around the house.  I started Weight Watchers two weeks ago and have (only!) lost 1.6 lbs or something.  It's frustrating.  It's also hard to coordinate with everything else that's going on (start of school for Nate, pacifier send off for Alex which is affecting his sleeping schedules, work, new house, etc.)  It takes time to weigh and measure and think but it's getting out of those habits that got me here in the first place!!

I am wearing...a sweater and skirt.  It's chilly (comparatively) today!  I'm happy to be back in jackets and layers, though...it helps me hide my trouble areas.

I am remembering...mi Abuelita.  Her birthday is Thursday.  She would have been 93.  I can't believe she's been gone for a year and a half already.  I have a special post coming up for her birthday in her memory. 
Siempre en mi corazón, Abuelita. Le pierdo.

I am creating...a patch board for Nathaniel to display the fire department patches he's collected.  I'd like to get his firefighter room put together before winter.  I'll see if we can work that into our budget/plans. 

I am going...to be busy for the next couple of weeks. September always proves to be busy, I think, but this year, with Nate starting Pre-K, and just having moved in, it's been crazier than usual. 

I am hoping...to be able to work exercise into this hectic week.  So far I have not been able to squeeze it in and I know that will help jump start my weight loss!  Unfortunately with Alex's bedtime fiasco's of late, I haven't been able to get both boys to bed and sleeping before 9:30 and by then I'm in settle down mode myself and deemed useless at that hour.  If I don't fall asleep with them, I usually do shortly after getting them to bed.

I am hearing...Zac Brown Band on my iPod...their music makes me very happy!

Pondering these words..."When I feel my world crumbling around me.. I look in my baby's eyes and am reminded why I must always stay strong" - My cousin had this posted as her Facebook status and it's so true.  There are many days when my children give me the motivation I need just to get out of bed and function.


Around the house...boxes, piles, and clutter.  I need a good solid weekend when the kids are occupied to tackle the mess that is my house.  It would also help to make it a priority, which my procrastinating nature has a hard time doing. 

On my mind...the Photoshop class that Heidi and I are starting tomorrow!!  I'm so excited about it!  I hope it teaches me what I need to take my photos to the next level!

Noticing that...it's very quiet around here today.  Which I like.  It makes for a better thinking day.  I feel less chaotic and cluttered when it's quiet.   I think that's why I turn off the TV at night when the kids are in bed.  It's more peaceful that way.

One of my favorite things...Alex just learned to say "I love you" and it's SO cute.  It warms my heart!!

A few plans for the rest of the week:  Photoshop class tomorrow, setting up with my sister for a garage sale she's having this weekend, spending the night with my sister to hang out at the garage sale on Saturday, then some family fun for the weekend since Dave is actually off!

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

 Cousins - September 4, 2010

Nate and Alex got to spend the day with Kensie at the zoo for her birthday 

- we're about to add another cousin to our brood - and can't wait!

I ♥ Faces..."Vroom, Vroom!"

This week's challenge over at I ♥ Faces is "Vroom, Vroom!"  I knew exactly what photo I wanted to use for this challenge!  Longtime readers of my blog first saw this photo as a Wordless Wednesday last November, but it remains one of my favorite captures of my oldest, Nathaniel, doing what he does best...mimicking Daddy.  Daddy was working on his truck next to us so Nate propped his beloved fire truck up on an available jack and "got to work"...The best part about this picture is his serious look, I think.  He was hard at work!

For more great photos of this week's challenge, check out this website!

Make-A-Wish

I am a big fan of the Make-A-Wish Foundation.  I think they do great things for wonderful kids and serve a fantastic purpose!  So, I feel a little guilty using this analogy, but I'm not sure how else to adequately describe it:  Nathaniel got a Make-A-Wish of his own granted this week (minus the usual terminal illness, of course).

As you know, my Bug is a bit of a firebug, if you will.  He lives and breathes all things firefighting.  We live in a "fire house", we have a "fire dog" (known as a lab mix to the rest of the world), we drive a "fire truck", and he introduces himself as an FDNY Firefighter to everyone he meets.

It all started with a letter writing campaign I decided to undertake in an effort to get some local fire department patches to decorate the firefighter bedroom we promised Nate in the new house.  I wrote up a short letter explaining his love of all things firefighting and sent it out to the local fire departments that I had addresses for.  I enclosed a self-addressed, stamped envelope to keep their costs and effort down and figured if I got a few patches out of the deal, it was better than nothing.

The first week or so we got a couple patches sent back.  I was excited to see that it was paying off.  Nathaniel loved getting mail with his name on it, and the discovery of a fire department patch inside was even more thrilling!

Then one day, a gentleman stopped at our house.  He introduced himself as the Lieutenant of the Fancher-Hulberton-Murray Fire Department and held up the letter I had sent saying, "I'm here about this".  My initial reaction was "uh oh"...I immediately started wondering what law I had broken or what etiquette I had failed to follow.  The gentleman went on to say "We won't be sending anything back in response to this."  To which I quickly responded that that wasn't a problem, that I was only asking....when he interrupted and said "We won't be sending anything in the mail...We'll be personally delivering him a patch...in a fire truck...on Tuesday."

My mouth fell open and I was giddy with excitement.

Little did I know that one short week later he and his entire crew would be parked in our driveway with every piece of equipment the fire department owns just to make my little boy's day year lifetime!

To say Nate got the royal treatment is an understatement of great proportions.  Lt. Chilson presented Nathaniel with a slew of goodies including a bunch of department patches, a F-H-M firefighter license plate, coloring book, ruler, pencil, calculator, 9-11 teddy bear, stickers, and his very own, real life fire helmet with shield.

He got a tour of the trucks, they opened them all up and showed him all the equipment, and then, as if that wasn't already a fabulous display, he got a ride around the block in the pumper truck with the lights and sirens a blaring!  It was priceless.  He was over the moon!  And almost a little overwhelmed by the whole experience but as he got more comfortable, he finally started warming up and was "radioing" in to his guys on the crew and singing his firetruck songs.

I can't say enough good things about this fire department and the fabulous people who make up this 100% volunteer organization.  They treated my son, a boy who was a complete stranger to them a week ago, like a rock star.  And solely on the precipices of making a 4-year-old wanna-be firefighter happy.  And that they did!  I don't know how I can ever repay them.  My gratitude and appreciation is inexpressible.

Happiness is...

the peace that a pile of dirt and some sand toys brings.

I love when my boys play nicely together.  Even if they're not interacting with one another, the silence is golden.  For 5 or 10, or sometimes even 15 minutes I get these moments where I can peacefully fold laundry at the back door or wash dishes at the kitchen sink and look out on the boys just doing what boys do.  Playing, getting dirty, exploring their worlds.  It's glorious.  Of course it often ends abruptly with one (or both) of them running to the door screaming "Mommy!" with a story of what the other one did to them...but until that happens, it is pure bliss.

Deep Breaths

Today was a less than stellar example of my motherhood skills.  I am generally able to possess mass quantities of both patience and understanding when it comes to my children, however, today, my stock was running alarmingly low on both.  It was one of those kinds of days.  You know the type...nothing was going smoothly, no one was listening, and even the "helpful" gestures from my small human beings were making everything twice as difficult.

Finally, near my breaking point, my husband intervened and told me to go take a walk.  "Grab your camera and go", he said.  I glanced at the clock.  I had 20 minutes before he had to leave for work, taking with him what was left of my sanity, so I didn't hesitate another second.  I did just as he suggested.  Without haste, my Canon XSI and I went for a walk in the woods - out into our newly acquired "back 5" (acres) as I like to call it!  

As I walked away from my house with nary a backward glance, I heard the bellowing screams of my children..."Mommy!"  "Come back!"  "No, Mommy!"...(please don't judge me if I tell you my steps may have gotten a little more brisk at the dissonant sound of their little cries).  If there is ever any question as to why I might be losing my mind, this moment brought it into crystal clear focus for me.

As I disappeared into the woods, I realized I had to walk a REALLY long way before I found silence, but I kept walking nonetheless.  Finally, surrounded by nothing but trees, with burrs covering my pant legs, and thorns nipping at my ankles, I started snapping photos.

Allergy inducing goldenrod suddenly took on a bright yellow, fresh, innocent beauty.

Simple piles of stone took on a life of their own as a story of how they came to be there unleashed itself in my head.  I heard the crisp snapping of grasshoppers jumping out of harm's way in front of me as I walked.

And I breathed.  Deep, slow breaths.  I took in this wonderful (and rare) moment of silence and I realized how lucky I am.

I am surrounded by beauty out here.  All around me are reminders of my own childhood.  Trees to climb, plants to learn about, animals to track, nature to experience.  Some of my fondest memories of growing up with my brother and sister on the "Homestead" were of the adventures we had and the lessons we learned.  My brother and I would find dead animals rotting in the woods and dissect them with a stick to see what their skeletons looked like. We caught toads and kept them in buckets.  Saw baby goats being born.   We used to squish up polk berries to make ink and used sticks as quills to write with.  To this day I almost inherently flip up the leaves of milk weed plants looking for the cocoon of the Monarch butterfly perched below.  I want that for my boys and here, I feel they will have that chance.  The chance to learn and grow and explore.  I hope I do half the job my parents did teaching us all there was to learn about the world around us.  I'm excited to have the opportunity to share this with them.

With renewed spirit, I headed home to my little men and sent my husband off to work with a fresh and level head and energized soul.  Who knew that 20 minutes in the fresh air of my own backyard would be so cathartic for the day I was having.  In the words of Annie, "I think I'm gonna like it here!"

10 on 10: September 2010

Finally, I remembered to participate in this month's 10 on 10.  Ok.  Sort of.  I got helpful reminders from Heidi all week.  Marked it on my calendar.  And still got all the way in to work this morning before I realized I had forgotten my camera.  So in a committed effort NOT to miss it yet again, I decided to do a 10 on 10 camera phone version.  I apologize in advance for the quality and unedited nature of these photos.  Hopefully you'll get the idea.  Today's photos give a few snippets at some of the stuff I have to "talk" about in the coming days/posts!  So here are my 10 photos taken once an hour for 10 hours on the 10th of the month...Enjoy!

For more 10 on 10 posts, check here!

Back in the Saddle...

Has it seriously been a week since I posted anything on here?!?!  That surprises me seeing as I usually at least get a Wordless Wednesday or Simple Woman's Daybook up...and have a million posts started, planned and/or brewing.  But not this week!  Too many exciting things going on here to put into one post so I promise to write a few of them up in the coming days and get my thoughts on "paper" before my brain moves on to Christmas shopping or a remodeling project or Nathaniel's college prep.  And just because a post is boring with no photos.  I bring you a photo of the delicious clam/shrimp dinner my husband made the other night in his latest garage sale steal (a clam steamer in excellent condition for $10!).  He threw corn in there and we feasted like royalty!  Nathaniel is a big sucker for clams, surprisingly.  He could probably out-eat me in a competition, if we were to do such a thing.  Alex, on the other hand, wants nothing to do with anything of the seafood variety.  That's ok...more for me (and Nate, I suppose!)  :)

"Talk" to you soon!

All Time High = All Time Low

I'm at an all time high. 

But before you applaud or rejoice or say "yippee", let me explain.  Never in my 34 years of life have I ever weighed THIS much.  Ok, I take that back...I did when I was 6 months pregnant with either of my children, perhaps.  But without the excuse of having an entire other human being in my body, I have never weighed as much as I do now.  This does not make me happy.

Thus, my "all time low".

Nathaniel was using one of my t-shirts (that I don't wear anymore because it's unflattering-ly tight) as a pillow the other day and said "What's this Mom?" - when I told him it was Mommy's t-shirt, he said (incredulously) "No, it's not Mom!  This is too small!   This is a shirt from when I was baby!".

I'm in a funk and I need to defunk-tify.  (Yes, it's a word.  I swear!)  I'm tired of being one of those Moms.  The kind you see and feel bad for because they've "let themselves go".  The words: frumpy, homely, uncool, and boring come to mind.  I want to be someone my children can be proud of.  I want to set good examples for them as far as eating healthy and being active go.  I don't want them to be embarrassed of me when they get older.   I want to fit back into cute clothes, and not have my wedding rings fit so snugly.  I want to feel pretty again and not worry that people are judging "the fat girl" for every little thing I put in my mouth.  I want to feel comfortable in my own skin again.

So, I vow to do something about it.

I joined Weight Watchers Online yesterday and have officially started meticulously tracking my points online today.  I will work exercise into my daily routine.  I will eat better, eat less, make healthier choices.  I have enlisted the aide of some of my best supporters and motivators for encouragement. 

So here's to big changes (and hopefully big LOSSES!) in the coming months...better Me, here I come!  

Wordless Wednesday - Disappointment

Simple Woman's Daybook...August 31, 2010

FOR TODAY...August 31, 2010

Outside my window...darkness has fallen.  It's been a long day!

I am thinking...of how pooped I am right now.  Did I mention it had been a long day?  Yet, I haven't done one of these in a few weeks so I figured I should follow through for once.

I am thankful for...a nice, cozy bed to go to sleep in.  And a fan to sit in front of - it is HOT today/tonight!  I'm also thankful that Nate was offered an available spot in the UPK program in our school district.  I was worried that we'd have to put him into an expensive private program that meant he'd only go 3 days a week, need to be dropped off and picked up by Dave, and he'd be in four different schools before he started Kindergarten.  At least this way, he gets to ride a bus, go 5 days a week, and be in the same school as he'll start Kindergarten in next year.  Oh, and it's FREE, which is fabulous!

From the kitchen...my beloved husband is getting me a drink because it's 500 degrees in here and I'm parched.

I am wearing...an odd combination of my work clothes (top) and comfy clothes (bottoms).

I am remembering...to watch Rescue Me with Dave tonight...if I am able to stay up another hour+, that is!

I am creating...I was able to work on a project for my (new) boss at work that was kind of outside the box of my usual M.O.  It had to do with editing a photo and getting it printed/framed for presentation to Chuck Schumer's office as a thank you for their help in making it possible for some of our HW-SC youth to attend the World Cup.

I am going...to be pretty busy this week/weekend.  I'm looking forward to it.  Lots of end of the summer fun to be had.  And less time to stress about what's (not) getting done at home.

I am hoping...to get the garage cleared out and the house settled before winter so I can park in the garage and not have to brush my car off.  There's a lot to do to get there (and a lot of summer fun left to be had while we still can) so I'm not sure if that will work out, but we'll try.

I am hearing...the sound of the news on the TV and fans.  We have 5 running in the house right now to cool it off and it's still 80 degrees in here.

Pondering these words...I've heard a lot of great quotes this week but of course I can't remember any of them right now when I need to.

Around the house...lots of projects to do.  A wish list a mile long and a list of tasks to tackle is never ending.

On my mind...not a whole heck of a lot at this time of night.  I'm empty.

Noticing that...living in the country is a lot different as a MOM than it was as a kid.  We've been tackling our fair share of poison ivy, bug bites, bees, skunks, snakes, and other country fun.

One of my favorite things...the internet.  I've been keenly aware lately of all the fantastic things available at my fingertips.  When Nate brought home a frog the other day, we were able to look up what frogs eat, and how to care for him (not that it mattered, in the end).  I can search for a much loved recipe, purchase diapers or coffee without leaving the house, look up the words to Nate's favorite song(s) for an impromptu sing-a-long, or get directions for how to do anything from tile a floor to sew a sock monkey.  It's an amazing resource for anything and everything.

A few plans for the rest of the week:  Melon Bean with Tiffany, having my BFF over for a tour of the new house, celebrating my niece's 2nd birthday, hanging with my sister, and catching the Great NYS Fair!!

Here is picture for thought I am sharing...

Nate's "Thinking Tree"...he spends a lot of time here, swinging, hanging out, just having quiet time - I love that he has a tree of his very own.

When I grow up...

I've been thinking long and hard about what it is I want to be when I grow up.  Okay, so I know I'm grown up already.  The early morning wake times and mortgage payments and job and household responsibilities remind me of that daily, however, I still don't know what I want to BE when I grow up.

I asked Nate the other day, since he (even at only 4!) seems to have it all figured out and he told me I would be a police officer.

Um, no.

I asked him if he could actually picture Mommy as a police officer, fighting crime and bringing bad guys to justice, and he said yes.

Which is proof that he has no idea what I should be when I grow up, either.

I wish I could pick a card (like in the game of Life) and know what I was destined to be.  It seems like all the things I wish I could do/be/achieve are long shots.  I have no idea where to even start.  I'm learning that I'm not much of a problem solver.  I like other people to fix things for me.  Tell me what to do.  Even after years of my father encouraging me to "look it up" instead of doing it for me, I still managed to develop a bad habit of sitting on my laurels until someone else takes care of things or it takes care of itself.  I'm a big fan of the "ignore it and it will go away" theory of change.  On one hand I believe this has made me a very malleable and easy going person.  I tend to be flexible and adaptable, but I also spend a lot of time spinning my wheels and never really getting anywhere.

Thus my current crisis.  If you asked me what I wanted to be, I'd say "an author" or "a photographer".  I'd spout off some grand plan to start my Keurig cartridge recycling business or find someone who can manufacture and distribute my "Feet Sheets", share any number of my children's book ideas, or ramble on and on about my dreams of making a living on Etsy so I can stay home with my (not-so-very babyish anymore) babies.  But where to start?!?  I have the passion, the desire, and the ideas...I just lack the most important things:  Know how, motivation, time, and skill.

The Story of a Boy and his FROG...

There once was a boy named Nate.

One day Nate found a frog in the backyard of his new house and brought him home to show his mother.

"Mom, look what I found!  I'll give you a hint...it HOPS!  Can I make him my pet?  Puh-LEEZ?!?!", he asked, batting his eyes with his free hand tucked under his cute little chin.

I paused...knowing the implications of such an agreement, but teetering with the fond memories of myself at his age capturing frogs, bugs, caterpillars and the like to name and call my own.  Until, that is,  they escaped, or were accidently squished loved to death, or shriveled up because they needed water or food or something I had neglected to provide them.  Anyway, I caved and told him we'd need to Google how to care for him and find out what he eats. In the meantime, we needed to find him somewhere to stay.

Within seconds, my giddy little boy was (not even kidding here), shaking the froggy's little hand (paw? foot?) saying, "Hi, Froggy!  I'm Nate!  You're going to be my pet!"  He promptly made a home for him in his Little Tykes toolbox, closed the door, and peeked in saying, "Don't you die on me!".  Nice.

We put Froggy, who at this time was named "Nokie" by Nate, into a bucket.  The boys added some small touches of home (rocks, grass, dirt) and we gave Nokie just enough water to get wet in if he wanted.

Nate loved having Nokie (who by this time, had been renamed "Kooky" or "Nookie" or something...) and decided to put him in his own "sun protector" and take him for a ride in his Cozy Coupe.  He laid under the tree with him (whose name at this point I've lost track of!) and watched him hop around.

We reminded Nate to put Froggy back into his "home" from time to time so as not to torture the poor creature and to give him some water and peace.

What a day of adventure these two had!  I think Nate taught Froggy all he knew about firefighting, saving people, and peeing in the woods.  It was a match made in heaven!

Then, without warning, Alex got a hold of Nokie/Kookie/Froggy and let him go.  He escaped into freedom and is probably breathing a sigh of relief as I type this.

The End.