Thursday, August 20, 2009

I've lost track...

I don't know if I'm supposed to be doing a Thinkbox Thursday (TBT) or a Flashback Friday (FF) so I'm starting off with a TBT. Not the typical kind though as I'm too lazy to get off my duff and pull a question from the thinkbox. Instead, I'm on my own personal thinkbox (similar to the soapboxes many of us have and get on from time to time, only mine is simply a semi-dull revelation that's dumping out of my overfull head at the moment).

Lately I've been overwhelmed by life. In a desperate attempt to fill my proverbial 5lb bag with 10 (or more accurately, 25) lbs of crap, I think I've developed a split in the seams. I'm spilling things out at an alarming rate.  Tasks, ideas, random thoughts, knowledge, responsibilities and expectations are falling out at a rapid pace. I pick a lot of the stuff back up and shove it back in the bag to be dealt with later, but some of these things are being forever lost and irrevocably forgotten. That's what happens I suppose when my brain gets full, my days get stretched to capacity, and the sand runs out in my hourglass.

I've realized lately that it's not just me trying to juggle and balance and accomplish more than the day allows time for - everyone has their STUFF.  The stuff that gets in the way of them being 100% where they are.  Stuff going on at home that's distracting at work, stuff going on in your mind or body that gets in the way of what you want or need to do.  I guess that's not an amazing revelation in and of itself.  What this makes me realize is that I really need to get a grip.  The difference between me and everyone else is not in how much stuff I have to cope with but in HOW I cope (or choose NOT to cope) with what's given me.  We all have our struggles to deal with and our crosses to bear.  But true character is developed in how we choose to handle these challenges in life.  I wish there were an easy fix or a sure fire trick to maneuvering life's tricky road with grace.  I guess that's what life is meant to teach us and why it is indeed a JOURNEY.  One on which I struggle and learn something every day.  I trip, I fall, I stumble and with the help of my friends and family, I pick up the stuff that falls out of my over full bag and sew up the seams in an effort to hold it all together so I can trudge along a little further.  

My 25 lbs of crap has me bogged down at times (and highly distractible) but I'm doing the best I can.  I honestly do not forget things or lose track of things on purpose.  In fact, it drives me nuts to be such an airhead.  So, please forgive me if I forget something important (something I promised you, a birthday or special milestone), throw me a bone if I don't get back to you in a timely manner (or forget to get back to you at all) and gently jog my memory if I have dropped the ball as I suffer from these inevitable moments of brain purge syndrome (BPS).   I ask that you simply remind me of where I was when my sentences trail off or ask again I have failed to answer a question.  And I, too, will do the same for you if/when needed.  Hey, it's only fair!

And because every post needs a picture and I could use beautiful flowers like this all year round, please enjoy my lilacs from this past Spring.  Ahhh, I can almost smell them now...

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